Fast and Furious 7 Review

I recently saw the new Fast and Furious movie in the theatre.

Although I had originally planned not to, as in my opinion, all there were to the earlier issues of the franchise were fast cars and clichéd dialogues, this movie’s trailer was simply too cool to miss. It showed us that other than the terrifically loud sound of the revving of an engine, we would also be exposed to mindless, impossible action sequences. Hats off to the team that put the trailer together; they sure know how to attract us stupid teenage boys!

The trailer filled my whole body with adrenaline, and my brain with disbelief, and so, I sauntered into the theatre, my body tingling with anticipation. Thankfully, the nonsensical movie did not disappoint.

Fast and Furious 7, directed by James Wan and starring Vin Diesel (the deepest voice ever), Jason Stratham (a British killer), Dwayne Johnson (one word- BIG), and the late Paul Walker (who ironically died in a high-speed car accident), is basically a revenge story. Stratham is the ‘big, bad bro’ of the villain of the previous movie. He wants revenge against the Toretto crew (sorry, family) for murdering his brother, and resolves to hunt them down, one by one. He is supposed to be a shadow, yet practically everyone knows who he is. The rest is pretty simple- the crew, in order to ensure their family’s survival, must in turn stop him. They must go for, as Dom (Vin Diesel) calls it- one last ride.

But enough about the story. The action is what makes the movie.

Two cars, going full pelt, slam into each other, and the drivers, apparently unscathed, engage themselves in a fierce street fight, while drones and missiles are firing through the city. A man, in order to save his colleague from a grenade explosion, falls approximately ten storeys from a building onto a car, and only receives a broken arm. In a few scenes later, he breaks his arm cast by flexing his bicep!

Paul Walker practically defies physics by sprinting up a truck as it falls down a cliff, upon which he leaps onto a speeding car. Cars, with their drivers inside, of course, are dropped from a plane, in order to make a quick entrance into a foreign land.

Oh, and Vin Diesel drives a $3.4 million red Lykan Hypersport, supposedly one of only seven others in the world, off a skyscraper. Twice. Although, I must admit, this scene was absolutely spectacular, and sent the entire theatre into a stunned silence, save the frantic thumping of our hearts in our chests.
(This action scene has been said to be the most plausible stunt in the entire movie, and may actually be doable. For more information go to http://www.vulture.com/2015/04/could-furious-7s-skyscraper-jump-really-happen.html )

The car is fearlessly driven off the skyscraper. Fearless, only due to the CGI.

The idiots face-dive from mountains, crash into each other, smash, bash and wallop one another with a decent amount of loud action sound effects, yet, the baffling thing is they show absolutely zilch signs of injury. Dwayne Johnson drives a van off a bridge onto a missile, and there is not a single scratch, nor an expression of pain on his face. It makes the rest of us who cry out upon stubbing our toe on the side of the bed look bad!

Furthermore, they perform these unbelievable feats with a steady stream of clichéd action dialogues and comical quips- ‘Never mess with a man’s family’, ‘Time to release the beast!’, ‘Daddy’s gotta go to work’, ‘Where’s the cavalry? I AM the cavalry!’ and so on.

Amid all the hair-raising action, the movie also manages to bid farewell to the late Paul Walker, in a remarkable and bittersweet way, which is surprisingly touching. Coupled with the themes of love and the need to protect one’s family, it actually manages to evolve into an action movie with an emotional trump card.

99% Action, 1% Emotion, that is.
Fast and Furious 7 is an exhilarating car race all the way.